Tourists And Bangkok: Not Always A Love Affair

Why Some People Might Not Like Bangkok (And Why That’s Perfectly Fine)

Ah, Bangkok. The city that never sleeps, except when it’s literally too hot to function. For many, it’s a dream destination with its bustling markets, stunning temples, and delicious street food. For others? Well, let’s just say their fondest memory of Bangkok is finding a shady spot to recover from heatstroke. So, why might some people not like Bangkok? Let’s break it down, and investigate.

1. The Heat That Could Grill a Chicken Midair

Let’s start with the obvious: the heat. Bangkok is like stepping into a sauna with no escape,  except that the sauna is always set to "Inferno." You’ll get out of the air-conditioned comfort of your hotel, and BAM! You’ve entered an oven. At first, it’s cute. Then it’s oppressive. By noon, you’re sweating in places you didn’t know you could sweat. No amount of deodorant or optimism can save you. Welcome to the Bangkok heat, where dashing from one 7-Eleven to the next is a competitive sport.

2. Traffic: A Slow-Motion Chase Scene

Ah, the traffic. If you think you’ve experienced traffic jams, think again. In Bangkok, the streets become a living, breathing organism of gridlock. Whether you're in a tuk-tuk, a taxi, or a bus, you’re not moving, at least not in any way that’s measurable. Google Maps might say it’s a 10-minute drive to the next place, but trust me, it’s going to feel like a trip to the moon. And along the way, you’ll come to appreciate the art of people watching because you’ll have lots of time to do that. And in the rainy season, travel times may even quadruple due to local streets being flooded.

3. Sidewalks: A Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Game

Navigating Bangkok on foot isn’t so much a pleasant stroll as it is an extreme sport. The sidewalks are a mix of broken tiles, motorbikes, street vendors, and inexplicable obstacles. Ever wanted to play "dodge the muddy hidden puddle"? Here’s your chance. And if you're feeling adventurous, you can also take a detour through an open sewer to add some extra spice to your walk. But don’t worry, it's all part of the experience.

4. The Smells: Eau de “Je Ne Sais Quoi”

Bangkok is a city of many smells. One minute, it’s the intoxicating aroma of freshly grilled satay. The next, it’s, erm, something else. Maybe it’s the unique scent of the city’s canals. Maybe it’s the wafting perfume of durian. Or maybe it’s just Bangkok being Bangkok. Either way, your nose will be put through a marathon of confusion, from the beautiful fragrances to the, uh, less pleasant ones. By the time you're through, you might just find yourself nostalgic for the smell of airport duty-free.

5. Scams That Are So Polite, You Almost Thank Them

Bangkok’s scams are a bit like surprise party guests: unexpected, yet strangely charming. One of the classics is the “The Grand Palace is closed today” scam. The man in the bright, unmissable t-shirt will guide you with the politeness of a thousand monks, all the while trying to get you into a gem store or, better yet, his cousin’s silk shop. They don’t shout. They don’t rush you. They just smile so kindly that you almost feel bad for not falling for it.

6. Tourist Food: Not Spicy, But Definitely Bland

You’ve probably heard it all before: Thai food is spicy. But then you come to Bangkok and order what is supposed to be a spicy dish, and it's mild and rather bland. In your head, you’re imagining a flavorful burst of heat, only to find yourself chewing what might as well be a plate of boiled water. This is because there’s a "spicy" and then there’s a "tourist-friendly spicy" (which is not really spicy) and you, my friend, got the latter. And the rice? Probably meh as well. Although Thailand boasts some of the best rice strains in the world (fragrant jasmine rice is the most famous), you'll hardly find them used in restaurants as they all use the cheapest varieties to maximize profits.

7. The Size of Bangkok: It’s Bigger Than Your Dreams (and Your Patience)

Bangkok isn’t just a city. It’s a sprawling labyrinthine mess of concrete, chaos, and confusion. It holds the record of having the most elevated expressways of any city in the world. It has 50 districts but they are all very similar, with the same buildings, same roads, and more food carts. It’s like the city grew exponentially overnight, and no one bothered to tell you. And while you’re busy trying to get from point A to point B, you’ll find that, in the end, point A is still 25 kilometers away, and your patience has worn thin.

8. The Shophouses of Doom and Dilapidated Charm

Bangkok’s urban aesthetic isn’t exactly winning beauty pageants. In many districts, you’ll find endless rows of gray, grimy shophouses, those concrete blocks where the ground floor is a business, and the upstairs is someone’s home (usually with laundry hanging like prayer flags of exhaustion). They’re charming in a chaotic, post-apocalyptic kind of way. Paint peels in artistic patterns, balconies lean at questionable angles, and every facade is a jumble of wires, air-con units, and rusty signs. Some look like they gave up on being buildings and decided to be urban fossils instead. Quaint? No. Unforgettable? Definitely. 

9. Buses and Routes: A Mystical Puzzle

Trying to navigate Bangkok’s bus routes is like solving a riddle with no answer. You’ll stand there, staring at the bus map like it’s a foreign language (which, to be fair, it is), and wonder how it’s possible that no one has ever deciphered this madness. The buses are color-coded, the routes are labyrinthine, and the schedule is written in ancient hieroglyphics. You’ll get on one bus, thinking you’re going the right way, only to discover it’s actually heading straight for the opposite direction. Good luck.

10. The Occasional Rat and Omnipresent Cockroaches

Let’s not sugarcoat it: Bangkok has its fair share of wildlife. You’ll see rats scurrying around like they own the place (because, let’s face it, they probably do), and cockroach, well, they just live everywhere. You might spotted them at the market, in your hotel room, on the sidewalk, in the alleyway, basically everywhere. They’re like the city’s unofficial mascot.

Final Thoughts

Bangkok is, without a doubt, one of the most fascinating cities in the world, but let’s not pretend it’s all paradise and mango sticky rice. Between the heat, the traffic, the weird smells, and the occasional rat sighting, it can be a bit much for some people. But hey, it’s all part of the adventure, right? In the end, even if you end up lost, sweaty, and slightly traumatized by the bus system, you’ll have stories to tell, and that’s what makes Bangkok unforgettable (for better or for worse).

So, whether you love it or hate it, Bangkok is an experience you’ll never forget. And who knows? Maybe next time, you’ll get the spicy dish just the way you like it. Or, maybe not.