Useful Thai Phrases for Tourists - Fun Read

Essential Thai Phrases for Tourists (Because Charades Only Works So Far)

So, you're off to Thailand, where the food is spicy, the beaches are Instagram-worthy, and the locals will pretend to understand your terrible pronunciation. Google Translate might help, but why not learn a few key phrases so you don't end up accidentally ordering fried cockroaches?

FYI, the Google transcription is totally useless, so here we used English phrase, Google transcription, Thai phrase, pronunciation. Use Google's audio button to hear the phrase if you want to practice and get used to the sound of Thai.

So here's your totally foolproof (lol) guide to Thai phrases, now with actual readable pronunciations (kind of) and extra useful stuff (like numbers, because bargaining is a sport here).

The Basics (Don't Be That Tourist)

1. "Hello" - "S̄wạs̄dī" (สวัสดี) 

   Say it like: "sa-wat-dee"

Bonus: Add a wai (hands together, slight bow) to look polite. Overdo it, and you'll look like a confused praying mantis.

2. "Thank you" - "K̄hxbkhuṇ" (ขอบคุณ)

   Say it like: "kop-kun"

Pro tip: Add "khrap" (if male) or "kha" (if female) at the end. Example: "Kop-kun khrap!"

3. "Sorry" - "K̄hāw t̂xng" (ขอโทษ)

   Say it like: "khor-toht"

Use this after bumping into someone, stepping on a vendor's foot, or accidentally eating a chili.

4. "No, thank you" - "Mâi ao, k̄hxbkhuṇ" (ไม่เอา ขอบคุณ)

   Say it like: "my ow, kop-kun"

Essential for avoiding tuk-tuk scams and "special" massage offers.

5. "What's your name?" - "Chên à-rai?" (ชื่ออะไร)

   Say it like: "chen ah-rai?"

Great for pretending to make friends (but really, you just need directions).

Food & Survival Phrases (Because Hunger is Real)

6. "Not spicy" - "Mâi pèt" (ไม่เผ็ด)

   Say it like: "my pet"

They'll nod, then serve you fire anyway. Good luck.

7. "Very spicy!" - "Pèt mâak!" (เผ็ดมาก)

   Say it like: "pet mak!"

What you'll scream after ignoring the above warning.

8. "Plain water" - "Nám plao" (น้ำเปล่า)

   Say it like: "nam plow"

Your lifeline after eating "mild" Thai food. Don't confuse this with "nam pla" which means fish sauce.

9. "The bill, please" - "Check bin" (เช็คบิล)

   Say it like: "check bin"

Or just mime writing in the air—universal for "I'm broke now."

Bargaining Like a Pro (Without Getting Ripped Off)

10. "How much?" - "Tâo rài?" (เท่าไหร่)

    Say it like: "tao-rye?"

Follow with a shocked face when they quote the "foreigner price."

11. "Too expensive!" - "Pâng mâak!" (แพงมาก)

    Say it like: "pang mak!"

Walk away dramatically, they'll usually call you back.

12. "Can you lower the price?" - "Lot dai mâi?" (ลดได้ไหม)

    Say it like: "lot dai my?"

 Works best if you smile. Or cry. Either way.

Numbers 1-10 (For Haggling & Not Getting Scammed)

1 - หนึ่ง - "nung"

2 - สอง - "song"

3 - สาม - "sam"

4 - สี่ - "see"

5 - ห้า - "haa"

6 - หก - "hok"

7 - เจ็ด - "jet"

8 - แปด - "paet"

9 - เก้า - "gao"

10 - สิบ - "sip"

Bonus:

- "555" = Thai LOL (because "5" is "haa").

- "100" - "Nèung roi" ("nung roy") – Useful for haggling.

- "4,000" - " S̄ī̀ phạn" ("see pan") - Useful when arranging short or long time.

- "800,000" - "Pæd s̄æn" ("paet sen") - Useful when buying a Hilux for your teerak.

Emergency Phrases (Just in Case)

13. "I need the bathroom" - "Pom/chan yàak bpai hŏng nám" (ผม/ฉันอยากไปห้องน้ำ)

    Male: "pom yak pai hong nam!"

    Female: "chan yak pai hong nam!"

Alternative: Just cross your legs and look desperate.

14. "Help!" - "Chûay dûay!" (ช่วยด้วย)

    Say it like: "choo-ay doo-ay!"

Hopefully, you won't need this (unless you've angered a monkey).

Final Tip:

If all else fails, smile, say "kop-kun khrap/kha," and throw in some baht. Thai people are forgiving, especially if you tip.

Now go forth, mispronounce everything, and enjoy your trip! "Chok dee!" (Good luck because you'll need it.)