A Quick Guide to Geckos in Thailand

Geckos in Thailand: Your New Uninvited Roommates

So, you’ve landed in Thailand, unpacked your bags, taken your first glorious bite of mango sticky rice, and are ready to relax in your Airbnb. You flick on the lights, and BAM, there it is. Clinging to the wall like a tiny ninja lizard. Congratulations. You’ve met your first gecko. And guess what? He lives here now.

Geckos in Thailand are not pests. Oh no. They are residents. You, dear traveler, are the guest. And they’re not going anywhere. They live on the ceilings, behind picture frames, under light fixtures, and occasionally, in your soul.

Now, before you start screaming or Googling “how to remove geckos from my room using prayer,” take a breath. These little guys are actually your allies. Think of them as the adorable, bug-eating security team you never asked for. Mosquitoes? Gone. Other annoying insects? Eaten. That weird flying beetle that appeared out of nowhere? Taken care of by Gary the Gecko, who’s now running wind sprints across your ceiling at 2 a.m.

And yes, they make noise. A lot of people are shocked to learn that geckos have vocal cords and absolutely zero chill. The tokay gecko, in particular, is a night-calling, soul-rattling beast that sounds like it’s yelling “TO-KAY!” repeatedly like it’s trying to win a karaoke contest from inside your wall. If you’ve never been woken up at 3 a.m. by a lizard screaming in your ear, have you even been to Thailand?

Let’s talk about the sizes. You’ve got your standard wall geckos, tiny, translucent, and surprisingly fast. Then there’s Big Daddy Tokay, who’s roughly the size of a small dinosaur and looks like he could open a beer with his jaw. Don’t try to catch him. He bites. And by bites, I mean he clamps with the enthusiasm of someone who’s been personally offended by your presence.

You might think, “Maybe I can get rid of them.” You can’t. Spray all you want, light candles, hang crystals, do a full moon ritual; they will outlast you. The only way to maybe keep them out is to seal every crack in your home, live in an airtight vacuum, and give up happiness. Even then, one will probably still parachute in through the air vent just to mess with you.

But eventually, something weird happens. You start to like them. You give them names. You cheer when they catch a bug. You nod politely when you see one skitter across the floor like it pays rent. You find yourself saying things like, “Oh that’s just Larry, he lives in the bathroom.”

So yes, geckos are everywhere in Thailand. They’re weird, loud, unpredictable, and occasionally terrifying, but they’re part of the charm. You’ll grow used to them. You’ll learn to sleep through their lizard opera. And one day, when you return home to a gecko-free country, you’ll look up at your boring, quiet, insect-ridden ceiling… and you’ll miss them.

Just not the ones that scream in your face while you’re brushing your teeth. Those guys can go straight to lizard hell.